These days are going by so fast. I’m just about to wash the dishes after tonight’s dinner and had to write down my thoughts.
When we got up this morning to the sound of Mickey and friends on the tv with all four of us in bed…I tried to start the day slow. We were tired from this week’s sickness but I knew there was snow to assess, breakfast to be thrown together and dishes to be washed. I tried my best to keep taking it slow and savor each moment. We spent the day watching tv, playing in the snow, cleaning off the cars and the driveway and putting Vienna’s new Valentine’s Day paintings in frames. As she helped me put the new safety lock in place in the front door, I realized how big she is getting now that she can unlock and lock doors with the simple twist of her finger and thumb.
I stand here in the kitchen, laundry still to be folded and the sink water still not turned on. Reminiscing about slow dancing in the kitchen today to Mama and Dada’s wedding song; her twirling by my hand while we wait for Brian to get out of Taekwondo.
While Arya lays at my feet no longer begging for food…I realize how lucky I am. It’s funny that I’m standing around the things I once hoped and prayed for. The mess, the noise and the stomping of little feet. It’s not to be taken lightly. Hard times paved the way for this moment. Reflecting on what once was and is no longer.
When I watched Vienna stare out the window this morning to see the fresh fallen snow, I think of the past two winters here in our tiny rental house and how much she has grown. I’m going to put the phone down now and do the dishes so I can return to sitting by those curious eyes and the voice today that said to me “mama amazing” when I was drilling in the lock. It made my heart grow three sizes. If we could all just see ourselves through the eyes of a child…
Time, please slow down. I accept the mess and this stage of life.
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